We are in the midst of a very hectic season. Our life consists of “Let’s make a quick run to…, We have to get back in time for…, When can we fit in…, Will we be ready for…, Did you remember that…, and so on and so on. The “…”s have to do with the house we are moving to, Darin’s mom arriving, kids going back to school, Miss O’s adoptive family arriving, our work with Take Action, Darin’s work with filters, checking in on Amo, appointments for Tyson and so much more. We are tired.
I almost hate even saying anything negative as we are so excited and thankful and blessed to finally have a house, but getting a house that is far from move in ready comes with a price, and that price is exhaustion! In the midst of the house busy-ness, the rest of our lives are going on as well. There are phone calls and emails that must be returned, decisions that have to be made, meals to be cooked, children to love and pay attention to, school shopping to take care of, 2 little Miss’ that need some hugs and kisses, work, ministry, friendships to tend, taking the time for each other and ourselves, doing more than just “making space” for God in our lives.
We pack in as much as we can, but sometimes there are things that are out of our control. These are the things that take us from “this is hard, but it will pass” to “will it ever end?” The heat lately has been unrelenting. It is hot when we wake up, the heat increases all day, our bedrooms are hot when we lay down at night and on and on the cycle goes. It is also dry, and while we are thankful for the small amounts of rain that have fallen, the earth is crying out for its thirst to be quenched! The heat makes every task seem that much harder and more tiring. Toss in a son who already struggles on good days, but now is facing a lot of change and the fears and anxieties that come with these changes. We do have some good days, but even those are peppered with hard, hard moments. Add to it a house that still doesn’t have electricity or a kitchen for that matter, boxes packed and stacked at 2 different locations, meetings that need to happen, but other things keep pressing in front, needing to be dealt with NOW.
We were actually still managing with all of that, but then on Friday night we get a call that Amo was having a seizure and that pretty much finished us. Done. Finished and klaar. No more! God, we can’t do this. We are tired, strung out, hurting physically, and now our hearts are in knots for this little girl that we love. With every incoming message my phone receives my son says “Did she die?” My daughter starts shutting down; I see it in her eyes. My husband, the one I want beside me in all things, is at the hospital, stressed, pouring out love and strength to our little lovey and her momma. We thank God that the seizure wasn’t severe and Amo returned home early the next morning, yet when we were right in the middle of it, the stress and grief and worry and heartache- oh my! Then after, we just crashed. Saturday night the whole family was in bed by 8 (mom by 7) and now it is Tuesday and we are still just cruising on fumes.
Life always seems to be tipping between slow and steady and fast and furious. Right now we are in the thick of the furious. It is hard. We each need to make the daily choice to have grace, heaps of grace with each other. When our kids are tired from sitting at the new house, missing the toys we packed at the old house, arguing over the last apple in the fridge because grocery shopping is considered a low priority activity--Grace. When my husband is tired and not helping me figure out the burning question of which room should be our bedroom and which should be the living room, when his head is full of things I have no idea about and his shoulders are burdened by a load he tries so carefully to keep centered on his own self--Grace. When I am at that icky “everything makes me want to cry” stage—Grace. Heaps of grace, lots of love, and time for each other, that is what we need during this stage of life. Carving time for each other when we are so short of it is hard, but necessary! Taking time to show love to each other and to those around us who are like family is hard right now, but worth it in the end. I was just saying to Darin this morning that even when we are no longer living in this house that is so all consuming of our time and energy, or living this life that has us feeling utterly swamped, we; our marriage, our family; will still remain.
I read these words recently on Facebook and they just resonated with such truth.
Let’s remind our hearts of this truth tonight: Prayer does make a difference. A life-changing, mind-blowing, earth-rattling difference.
We don’t need to know how. We don’t need to know when. We just need to kneel confidently and know the tremors of a simple Jesus girl’s prayers extend far wide and far high and far deep.
“The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” James 5:16b (NIV)
Prayer really does change things. We saw this the night Amo had her seizure. We sent out many What’s App messages asking for prayer and Tyson, Jori and I also stopped, sat and cried out for healing for our sweet Amo. What an amazing way to give our kids a tangible, vivid, living knowledge that God hears us (and we did pray for peace no matter what!).
Will you please pray with us now, over these next few weeks as things ( all GOOD things) will continue ramping up, not slowing down; As we prepare to have Darin’s mom for a visit, meeting Miss O’s new family, working on the house and moving into a work in progress (prayers especially for electricity!), our work with Take Action that will be starting up full force after a holiday break, Darin’s work with distributing filters and all the other things that crowd his mind each day, kids going back to school, first individual counseling session for Tyson, and just for all of us to not lose our sanity, our hold on each other or our grip on the Thread that holds everything together as we face these coming weeks. Thank you in advance!